beer

taken from the placemat in a cafe:

• Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy (Benjamin Franklin)
• You can't be a real country unless you have a beer and an airline. It helps if you have some kind of football team, or some nuclear weapons, but at the very least you need a beer. (Frank Zappa)
• Beer will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no beer. (Freddie Freak)
• Beer has food value, but food has no beer value. (JR Robertson)
• In Vino Veritas, In Cervesio Felicitas (In wine there is truth, in beer there is joy) (Anonymous)
• He was a wise man who invented beer. (Plato)
• 24 beers in a case. 24 hours in a day. Coincidence? (Steven Wright)
• I like beer. On occasion, I will even drink beer to celebrate a major event such as the fall or communism, or the fact that the refrigerator is still working. (Dave Barry)
• If God had intended us to drink beer, he would have given us stomachs. (David Daye)
• WIthout question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind is beer. Oh, I grant you that the wheel was also a fine invention, but the wheel does not go nearly as well with pizza. (Dave Barry)
• Beer makes you feel the way you ought to feel without beer. (Henry Lawson)
• In my opinion, most of the great men of the past were only there for the beer. (A.J.P. Taylor)
• Good ale will make a cat speak. (Old English Proverb)
• I'd rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy. (Tom Waits)